Cedar Point Pics

A view of the park on the way in. At this point, I'm shaking with excitement like a small child awaiting the arrival of Santa Claus. Except Cedar Point is real, and fucking Santa Claus isn't. Stupid kid. I'm way cooler than you.


Ride #1. It swung back and forth like a pendulum, while the end of it spun in circles. I vomited 11 times before, during and after this ride. I don't remember what it was called, but the name was super hanky, as can be expected.


Ahhh, yes, the Mantis. We were walking by it and the wait was approximately 10 minutes, so we had to ride it. You stand up during the ride and it puts a ton of pressure on your knees and balls. It really hurts, and I regret riding it every time. I can't wait to ride it again next time I go, so I can regret it.


The giant first hill of the Millenium Force. Possibly the best roller coaster ever. It's like the Jr. Gemini or the Blue Streak, except exactly the opposite. Fun.


The Mean Streak. It's called the mean streak because it's the most painful rollercoaster ever designed. It is or was the largest/fastest wooden roller coaster in America (the world?), and I sustained permanent kidney damage from riding it. There was literally no line, though, so how can I turn it down? A little bit of internal bleeding is worth it. Honestly, it feels like each kidney has a separate jackhammer going to town on it, for about 3 minutes.


This ride is seriously sweet. The "Top Thrill Dragster" (their marketing team is really genius). It launches you from a complete stop to 120 mph in about 2 or 3 seconds, then you go up that hill, and back down at probably 90 mph. It lasts 30 seconds and is the best 30 seconds ever. If you ever go to Cedar Point and don't ride this, you are an idiot.


This is the launching area for the dragster. I don't know why I took a picture of it, and now you have to look at it. Enjoy.


The Raptor. The last ride we went on, it made us all incredibly dizzy and might have given Colin a concussion. We rode more rides than those pictured here, but it was a long day of extreme heat, and a great deal of sweating that resulted in a high degree of lethargy.


Notice said lethargy. I think I might have caught Dan picking his nose. That's awesome.


Pizza buffet. Dan decided to get peach slices with his pizza and salad. He did wash his hands after picking his nose, by the way. He's classy like that.


Look at how beautiful Dan's plate is. Very colorful, well-balanced, and an excellent presentation. Canned peaches have never looked so good. That's chicken, bacon and ranch pizza, too, if you're keeping score at home. Delicious.


Believe it or not, those are all the pictures I took at Cedar Point (and the pizza buffet). I didn't even take pictures of other stuff at home. I need to get better about that so you can share in my fun.

Have a nice day folks, and Happy Labor Day.